I was subbing in a Kindergarten class when the incident occurred. This little one was testing the boundaries all day. I was around enough to know that this was a daily occurrence. I also knew he was a very smart kid. I had deterred objects from being thrown and name calling, but what came next was very unexpected and thankfully comical.
After we had just talked about not throwing things, and the what he could do differently spiel… this little one ran over to the crayon caddy and as fast as he could grabbed some crayons at which point he then ran over to the garbage and threw the ones he gathered into it. All the crayons he grabbed had been white… all the white crayons were now in the trash and he looked about at me defiantly and did not wait for any questions or comments. He just started ranting, “no one needs white crayons. It was just the white crayons, nobody needs them anyway.” Over and over he repeated the unnecessary status of white crayons.
I sat and thought, and tried very hard not to laugh at his passion for ridding the world of the said “useless” white crayons. Then by God’s grace a thought came to me and I calmly asked him, “What if I need to draw a snowman at night on black paper?” The look on his face was priceless. After he gathered himself, he conceded, “I never thought of that.” It is one of my favorite subbing stories even though that day certainly tested my patience and wits.
Today someone reminded me of that story and I laughed at first, and then something resounded in my soul. God includes white crayons in our lives, those things that seem to serve no purpose, things that seem like a waste, or so unnecessary, and many times I am like the little kid yelling at God about how no one needs the white crayons. There’s no use for them because I cannot see the good in it, and I have no use for it, I declare it useless, and want to throw it away, or avoid whatever it is… but God.
The Bible is full of but God situations. Situations that seem useless and hopeless, but God. You need the white to draw on the darker shades of paper. Sometimes we have the white crayon, but have no idea what it is for and it seems so useless, other times we have the dark paper but nothing in our caddy seems to show up on the dark paper.
They are both needed. My train of thought kept going about this word picture and how really it comes down to trust. Do I trust that God has a purpose for those “white crayons” in my life? Do I trust that He will use them to make something beautiful, even in very dark spaces that also do not seem very useful? Do I trust that the creator and author of this life will make something beautiful with whatever He has allowed to be included in my crayon caddy of life? I am sure I will also be like that little boy in heaven when all will be made right and have to concede that “I never thought of that.”